| |
If your aim was to discover the interwebs home of the funny t-shirt, you’ve made it. Congratulations! And we aren't just funny t-shirt central, either. Our store boasts not only licensed logo t-shirts for the award-winning TV shows, House MD and The Office, but we also claim awesome-t-shirt-sovereignty over the realm of novelty tees, rude shirts, funny t-shirts, peace sign t-shirts, t-shirts that pwn, gamer shirts, drinking tees, party shirts, and tees for the sexy (and by sexy, we mean funny t-shirts. We’re consistent like that). We take pride in our cool t-shirts, sourcing high quality t-shirt garments to ensure guaranteed customer satisfaction. The funny t-shirt designs on all of our pages are our own exclusive Tshirtoutlet creations.
One of our absolute favorite, bad-ass funny t-shirt designs, if we do say so ourselves, is the ceaselessly-growing-classic party t-shirt for St. Patrick’s Day, Irish Yoga. Drink ‘til it hurts? OKAY. (We’re easy. Easy like Sunday morning super-cool funny t-shirts.) Sure, it’s an obnoxious t-shirt. But that’s why we love it. We also kind of totally worship our Dunder Mifflin t-shirt. We’re licensed to use the Dunder-Mifflin logo legit on a t-shirt, since we hold the license for NBC’s staggeringly brilliant, award-winning television show, The Office, and so we figured, hey, what the HECK, let’s put the Dunder-Mifflin logo on a kick-ass, super-comfy Dunder Mifflin hooded sweatshirt (hoodie to you thirty-somethings - *eyebrow waggle*). We’re crazy-insane-funny-awesome-smart like that. (Yes. We ARE ALL OF THOSE THINGS. AT ONCE.) Speaking of funny movie t-shirts, which we weren’t, but now we are (see how I did that? I know. Rad funny t-shirt Ninja skills, non? Yes), Dumb and Dumber orange tuxedo t-shirts + blue tuxedo t-shirts are wicked-awesome. And the novelty t-shirt version is way less pricey than the whole suit. So HI. Thanks to our silly t-shirt selection, Halloween costume t-shirt dilemma solved. YOU’RE WELCOME. A Dumb and Dumber funny t-shirt that isn’t quite so cliché, you ask? Alrighty, then. How ‘bout It’s Okay! I’m a Limo Driver! on a kick-ass funny t-shirt? You’re right. It’s genius. Especially because it’s on a t-shirt. It’s like wearing your favorite gift-store card, only you’re spending money on a cool t-shirt and NOT SOME FANCY CARDBOARD. That would only get ruined if you took it out in the rain, to an outdoor party. Not so much with our party shirts – they LOVE rain. They THRIVE in rain. (Especially the funny t-shirts.) Hooray! And last but not least, no, never least, there’s the Not You, Fat Jesus slogan t-shirt, for the Hangover-inclined. (Or maybe you just like saying ruhtard.) If you fancy a t-shirt of said ilk, we got you faded. (That’s teenager-talk for “got your back.” Except, unlike teenagers who can’t keep their promises, we mean it. We cover your back with a solid, quality, cool t-shirt. Yes. We. Are. Awesome. *bows*
So you may have noticed that our site gives it up for orders that surpass the fifty-dollar-mark. Which is true. You spend fifty pieces of lettuce (or cheddar, or dough, depending on your geographic location) on some funny t-shirts, and we cover the shipping charge, which for you means you pay nada for shipping. Zip. Zero. Zilch. (The shipping mode is US Postal Service priority mail, which has a guaranteed delivery time of 1-3 business days, so even if you have something shipped to the East Coast, you still get your cool, funny shirts within a week’s time.) You don’t even have to use a coupon code or other gimmicky mention of silly t-shirts or anything similarly cheese-encrusted; we JUST GIVE IT TO YOU (on your purchase of over fifty dollars’ worth of cool, funny t-shirts). Can you believe how nice we are? Yeah. Neither can we. But if you need to tell us how funny, er, awesome, we are, you may, by emailing us (We sure do loves us some fan mail).
We now offer the famous (infamous?) Dickens Cider shirt. You know. The t-shirt with the Dickens? Cider? EXACTLY. It’s pretty offensive, for an offensive t-shirt. But, okay, look. Disclaimer: we believe in offense. It’s an important place to be, and the best place to begin is with an offensive t-shirt slogan. It’s protection for the t-shirt portion of your body. (It’d be even better if it had a built-in plate to protect the solar plexus, but that’s probably best left to a different kind of company. Although it does give us a few ideas for a sex-pack shirt. Er, SIX-pack chest costume tee.) In the meantime, our offensive t-shirts do a reliable job of saying what your mouth may feel reticent to bust out. Like our Simon Says You Suck t-shirt. Okay, but that’s not the greatest example, because it’s more a funny t-shirt than an offensive t-shirt. It rides the fence between funny t-shirt and offensive shirt pretty beautifully, as a matter of fact. Not that we’re into bragging. We don’t need to. We just give you the tools to do it for us. If you want to. If you’re into funny, cool t-shirt braggery. (Nope. Braggery=not a word. So? Word-invention is JUST ONE of the MANY AWESOME THINGS OUR STORE CAN DO. Which comes on TOP of providing awesome, cool t-shirts for everyone under the sun. *points finger-guns, aims, makes appropriate sound-effect, pats self on back*)
Surprisingly, you’d think nobody’s mom would be interested in t-shirts from us, given the kind of ridiculous level of rude t-shirt shenanigan-heights to which we take things, but MAN, do the moms love us. YEAH. YOU HEARD THAT RIGHT. *shrug* If we had to guess at which cool t-shirts reel them in the quickest, we’d say it’s our officially-licensed House MD t-shirts, and most specifically, our Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital House MD t-shirt, which your mom likes so much that we came up with the Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital hooded sweatshirt to accompany the Princeton Plainsboro t-shirt. Your mom LOVES US for that shirt. We even let her have one the last time we, uh, “talked.” See? Please reference the above paragraph if you need the reminder; WE’RE NICE. As a general rule, your mom loves our House MD t-shirt line more than any other t-shirt line, regardless of the level of cool t-shirt/funny t-shirt/rude t-shirt/party t-shirt action being handed down. And ain’t nobody got shiz on our t-shirt ferocity. (Tell your mom we said hi.) (On second thought, don’t. She cried the last time we sent her a message.) (Crying, unlike rain at outdoor parties, does not suit our funny t-shirt cred.)
Your Dad likes us, too, but only because we have given him THIS EPIC MARVEL T-SHIRT OF GLORY AND WONDER: the D.A.D.D., or "Dads Against Daughters Dating" t-shirt. Yes. It makes up for everything involving your mom. (We hope.)
Speaking of funny party shirts, and again, we were, but only relative to t-shirts as an umbrella topic, godDAMN we’re awesome at maneuvering the topic back to where we want it (guess it’s all that practice we’ve had with your mom), our funny party t-shirts make your basic filthy t-shirts look pure as the white cotton tees your mom wears (which, believe us, we know). For instance, there’s the Mas Cerveza, Por Favor! t-shirt, a polite slogan shirt if there ever was a polite slogan tee, the The Importance of Teamwork t-shirt, which really encourages group participation and trust, on a SHIRT, YOU'RE WELCOME, the Hey Princess… Bring Me a Beer! t-shirt, again, polite slogan t-shirt emphasis here, the Beer Pong Hero t-shirt, the Shooting Practice t-shirt, and the sustained classic, the Irish Yoga t-shirt of awesomeness. Any one of these funny party t-shirts would take you through several days of drinking and partying in mad style. You won’t notice because you’ll be too busy smashing into walls and falling over park benches, but WE will, because we’re probably stalking you to see if you’re gonna need a trip to the ER anytime soon. (We promised your mom.)
We do it because we care. We care about our beloved party t-shirt customers. We think you’re great, and we appreciate you for picking Tshirtoutlet over all others, and it’s just how we roll to keep you from getting marked by some crazed, funny party t-shirt-loving teenage Teen-Wolf gang that haunts college dorm parties and waits for funny-t-shirt-clad, drunk-as-hell students to fall over park benches before seizing them and stealing their rad, funny party t-shirts en masse. Even if said funny shirts have survived many rounds of beer pong, and are very much the worse for wear. EVEN IF THAT HAPPENS. We got you faded. (Teenage-talk! Points! Drink!) (Ha. We don’t drink at work. And even if we did, do you seriously think we’d talk about it on the internerds? NEVER. We would never.)
We source from Gildan, Kavio, Alstyle, and American Apparel for our high quality 100% cotton t-shirts, because we believe in giving Tshirtoutlet customers the best of the funny t-shirt best. There are, after all, loads of stores selling silly shirts, 80s tees, funny t-shirts, vintage shirts, slogan t-shirts, St. Patty's day tees, drinking shirts, party t-shirts, licensed logo tees, gamer shirts, redneck shirts, fishing t-shirts, and the like, and we plan to stand out. Part of that plan involves quality t-shirts. The other part involves teh funny shirts, and being very, very drunk. YOU. NOT US. Duh. Only the best t-shirts shall survive! BOO-YA, everyone else.
(Did we mention, there are shirts on our site that zero in on the smartest people on earth, aka BACON LOVERS UNITE FTW?! Because, yes. Here's a bacon t-shirt. And here's ANOTHER bacon t-shirt. Sigh. Bacon. We would wear the bacon itself, but then we'd be naked about half an hour after getting dressed.
Everyone, and we do mean everyone, loves, and by loves we mean WORSHIPS our shirts, and our selection can’t be trumped, so get yer gamer t shirts here. Buy humor t shirts for your friends, or pick up a gift t shirt for someone you love (and if your plan is to have sex with them, too, it’ll be our little secret. Unless you don’t want it to be. We can hook you up and take it either way if you ask us real nice, SICK FREAK). Our shirts are so darn good (may we brag? Why, thanks!), WE EVEN SELL WHOLESALE T SHIRTS. Yep. You read that right. We wholesale our funny shirts. Stick that in your t-shirt-lovin’ noggin for when the time is ripe.
We offer men’s t-shirts, women’s shirts, college t-shirts, 80s t-shirts, novelty t-shirts, funny t-shirts, cool shirts – a t-shirt for every drawer, and a slogan t-shirt for every torso. Granted, a sense of humor is crucial, if only for the wearer. People who view the funny slogan on your t-shirt might not SEEM amused, but when you walk away, believe us, OH, THEY’RE LAUGHING at your funny t-shirt. Take it from us. People are ALWAYS laughing at us as we walk away. And we’re certain it’s our t-shirt, and not the way our ass looks in these pants. Or that we were just flinging boogers.
We recommend the following, for awkward/uncomfortable/risky situations; that you simply put on a funny t-shirt and leave the rest of -- everything -- up to fate. (Maybe not the upcoming test for your organic chemistry class. No funny t-shirt in the universe could slide you through on that, sans studying, unscathed. Of course, it’s worth a try. The t-shirt will still belong to you, even if you receive a very large FAIL in everything else. Nothing t-shirt-ventured, nothing t-shirt gained, is our mantra.)
(And you know what? Sixty percent of the time, it WORKS. EVERY. TIME.)
Basically, we carry the most filthy, funny t-shirts, and you'll love our original content. Sure, yes, our funny shirts, vintage tees, distressed t-shirts, party shirts, rude t-shirts, drinking t-shirts, redneck shirts, fishing t-shirts, bowling t-shirts, women’s shirts, logo tees, licensed t-shirts and slogan t-shirts will attack you with our dominance of teh awesome, but beyond that? We’re kind of a big deal in the t-shirt arena, and you will know us from our pwn.
|
|